Do you think we’re shaped more by our experiences or by who we are?
Are we shaped by experience or shaped by who we are?
This is not as easy as it looks.
At first glance, I said: experience.
Life teaches us how to live through the many experiences we gain day after day.
And… the more experiences we have, the more we change along the way.
So yes, experience does shape us.
But wait a minute…
I re-read the whole thing again.
Doesn’t us or we came before experience?
Yes, it’s who we are that first exists and shapes us.
Experience follows.
Experience offers possibilities and changes.
Yet, who we are is the root of our life tree.
Or, better put, who we are is made of a special fabric woven from too many threads.
There are certain things that make us but can’t be changed; things like our souls, our origin, and our families.
Yes, I know everything can be changed nowadays, including some of the things I just mentioned, but you can’t erase them from your “who you are” identity.
After each and every experiences you live through life, it’s “who you are” that manages it in the way “ who we are” wants.
Is your head spinning right now?
Mine is, but only because of the AC, which I don’t like at all. But in some places, it is the most convenient way to survive on holiday in a tropical country.
So, back to this life shaping player.
Simply, we are shaped by who we are.
Out of each and every experience, we’re the ones who decide whether to learn the lesson, to ignore it, or to destroy it.
Some experiences may push us to be cruel, savage, or selfish.
But in the end, it’s us who decide whether to follow the experience’s recommendations or not.
A flight with almost fourteen hours and a three hours transit, is not easy at all.
If you’re accustomed to these long… really long flights, then you really deserve an award for endurance.
I think I deserve two, since this is my first holiday with such a long journey.
Perhaps I deserve three, since this flight also comes with a big time difference.
Three or two hours difference wouldn’t be such a big deal.
But… wait, 1,2,3,4,5,6, 7 hours make a significant difference.
Time suddenly feels as if it’s going in opposite directions.
In the morning, you drag yourself out of bed, your eyes so heavy that you fall asleep again everywhere, at any moment.
At night, you feel wide awake, and surprisingly hungry and ready for outdoor activities.
Breakfast time becomes dinner time and dinner becomes breakfast.
The sun that plays tricks on you in the Uk is now punctual, serious, and happy.
How happy?
So happy that she’s laughing all the time, watching people out and about in sunglasses, hats, and face fans; all enjoying her majesty’s presence.
Rain visits often but, lightly so far, as if trying to lighten the mood.
Unfortunately, the mood refuses to be lightened because of humidity.
And humidity is that heavy, sweaty, stick neighbour no one likes.
And finally, after those first confused, steamy, lazy days, a gentle nudge of writing arrived, with a smooth landing, to save these funny moments in this post.
Why do you think there is a villain in almost every story?
Because without one, the story would not only be boring, but also unrealistic.
There is a bad apple everywhere in life, and real life is such a big story.
So…this person who stirs problems, spread lies, wounds others, behaves this way mainly for their own benefit.
After all the hard efforts and plights the villain weaves and plots, they gain no real prize, only a bloated self-satisfaction.
They could do far worse things, of course, but let’s stop at this level.
Do you think a villain has any good point?
A good point for being mean, sneaky, and evil!
Perhaps this good point is possible in fiction, where the writer is the sole weaver of the character. In fiction, the only “good point” a villain can offer is a memorable warning sign — a danger zone marked with a quiet Please Be Careful note.
In real life, things are different. The villain chooses to be a villain, chooses the path of Abel, Scar, and… Voldemort.
There is no good point they can have, or pretend to have.
Is there any good point left after choosing to be the bad apple?
Can you live your whole life measuring things with a pencil and a ruler?
But a life like that will be so stiff.
By the way, using a pen and a ruler is a common expression is Arabic, or you can say in Egypt. If you say someone lives by a pencil and a ruler, you mean they measure everything in life.
Actually… it can be a compliment.
But it can also be a defect.
The extreme opposite of this condition is chaos.
And if someone is known as chaotic, this means their life goes upside down, aimless, and messy.
There’s no way chaotic can be an advantage.
But a bit of chaos won’t hurt.
Actually, it can make some change, bring a laughter, or earn you some skills.
And what better example is there than baking?
My daughter insists on following the recipe from A to Z, including the exact measurements and using the scale which I bought mainly for decoration.
Yet the kitchen under her supervision looks like bedlam.
I usually, perhaps out of experience, take the shortcut.
No measurements, no scale, and always sticky hands.
Still, the kitchen under my supervision looks no better.
In both cases, we enjoy the chaos in the chaotic kitchen, even though we chaotically complain about the mess.
But without this chaos, we would be sacrificing baking for the sake of glassy, glossy Kitchen.
What’s a lesson you’ve learned recently that shifted your perspective?
Probably, you usually learn something new everyday.
But out of all the things you learn, only a few can change your special, woven thread of perspectives.
Changing your views can never be easy because they are your own views, the outcome of your experiences, your beliefs, your knowledge, and your feelings.
As part of her sacred duty, life teach us a new lesson every now and then.
And every now and then, something happens that makes you change your way of thinking or even your way of living.
Sometimes, you just adapt to the change without thinking too much about the cause.
But if you pause a little and reconsider the change, you will put your hand on it.
Am I being a bit philosophical in this post?
Maybe.
By the way, when any of your perspectives change, it means you too have changed.
I can’t think of anything specific right now that shifted my perspectives.
