personal thoughts

Hate Or Envy

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Both are destructive feelings, but which one do you think is worse?

I don’t know about you, but I believe envy is far more harmful and destructive. It’s envy that opens the door wide to hate, but not the other way around. For example, you hate evil, but you would never envy it. Hate is a stong word which is used for limited and specific reasons or occasions — that’s how our hearts work.

Isn’t it interesting that the heart in Arabic is called Qalb which means something that constantly turns or changes? This can explain why the people or things you hate today, might be the ones you like tomorrow.

On the other hand, envy is an awful disease. It is fed by pride, grows on jealousy, and produces one rotten fruit — hate. It begins as a small, sickly plant called jealousy. One day, you notice that your colleague at college is popular and beloved by all. You start watching them, and wishing them ill. That is when the sharp thorns of envy begins to sprout on the sickly plant. Eventually, you start plotting against your colleague. By this point, the rotton fruit of hate has blossomed, bearing no goodness, and knowing no mercy.
“I want what is yours” “I am better than you” “I will destroy you” the envier whispers, and laughs out loud.

Years ago, my teacher spoke to us about the dangers of envy, describing it as a satanic trait. “Hadn’t Satan been jealous of Adam? Hadn’t he envied Adam? Hadn’t he promised to destroy Adam and all his descendants? He had, full of pride, and challenging God,” my teacher explained and advised us to strive for a positive and healthy mindset. “Instead of focusing on the others, focus on yourselves. If you admire something in others, try to create your own version of it. And, if you find things staring to lean towards envy, pray and pray and pray. God will guide you towards finding your way out.”

May your heart never know envy, and be full of love!

Amen

With hope and peace,

Nahla

personal thoughts

Opposites And Light

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‘Opposites throw light upon each other.’

Isn’t this a wonderful quote? Do you think it is common to experience it in this fast-paced, technological world? I doubt it, but first, let me explain my interpretation of the quote.

The opposites in the quote refers to the unique pairs of opposites: day and night, male and female, sound and silence, etc. Here, light symolizes beauty. Now, when you think of it, you can see how the opposites form a beautiful conection in a special, unique way. They complete each other.

Why then, do I doubt this beautiful quote’s relevance in nowadays life? Simply, because, in most cases, the opposites we encouter are not complementary, but  rather one – sided entities with one – sided purposes. As for the light, it’s mostly artificial nowadays.

There are also the opposites in thoughts, which can throw a shinning light on conversations, discussions, or brief encounters. In this context, the shinning light symbolises respect and understaning. Can we allow  this light to flow, or will we turn it off for ever? In other words, we can choose to make our differing ideas fruitful and treasured, or to discard and misuse them.

That’s how opposites throw lights upon each other — just like the day welcomes night, and the night blesses the day.

Does my perspective make sense? I hope so.

With hope and peace,

Nahla

personal thoughts

Friends

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How many beautiful quotes and sayings do you know about friendship? Loads, I am sure.

But, how many of these fantastic quotes reflect your friendship experience in real life? A few, and I believe that “true friendship is rare” is the most realistic adage.

Years ago, as we were relocating, my middle son was so upset because he didn’t want to leave his friends. The more I explained how it was a good promotion opportunity for his father and all of us, the angrier he became. Then he exploded: “It’s easy for you because you have no friends.”

I didn’t know why his words hurt so much, though they were true. It’s not that I have never had any friends, or that I am an introvert, or I don’t like socialising. I am not. Besides, if  the long list of contacts on your phone and social media accounts counts as true friends, then I have enough. Do you think they count? I don’t think so, because friendship is about quality, not quantity.

By the way, what is a friend?

A friend is someone who crosses your path naturally, smoothly, and unexpectedly. They make you feel comfortable. They truely listen, and genuinely talk.They make you laugh, weep, and even get mad. They wish  you well, and mean no harm. Above all, they trust you, and you trust them.

You may say this perspective of a friend is too angelic to find in the human world. But, I don’t mean they have to be perfect. I don’t expect them to be flawless. I don’t ask for a stong CV with high qualifications, extensive work experience, and a dazzling photo on top of it.

I only expect my friend to be a human with a genuine presence. A friend who wouldn’t disappear all of a sudden, and would ask about me if I did. A friend who promises to call and keep their promise. Is this too much?

Perhaps, that’s why we made the best friends in the simple, carefree, and funny phase of childhood. But later on, things take a different route. In our teen years, friendship becomes moody, insecure, and even dangerous, just a reflection of the phase. In adulthood, it is casual, business – like, and a pastime much like social media. In middle age, it is a good book – the best friend indeed. And, in old age, I believe it will be a blend of good and bad memories.

By the way, this is my perspective on friends and friendship, and as we say in Arabic, it’s not the Holly Quran, so you can disagree.

Now, back to my son’s words. He didn’t ‘intend to hurt my feelings. He was about eleven years old, and his friends meant the world to him. He didn’t know about the phases of friendship, nor did he expect his mother to have gone through the same experiences with their ups and downs. Now, he’s twenty – two, and he has forgotten about his childhood friends, and has to move for better opportunities. It’s funny how I am the one asking about the whereabouts of his old friends. In most cases, he doesn’t know.

Isn’t that just how life is?

With hope and peace,

Nahla

P.S. I started this post last Friday, night but due to many intqerruptions including having a bad cold, It took longer than usual.  Finally, it’s all done.

personal thoughts

People Do Tell On Themselves

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Isn’t that one of the life’s greatest ironies?

Sometimes, a person is so careful, so clever, so well prepared – in short, a brilliant actor. And yet, as the old Arabic saying goes: A slip of the tongue can expose lies, hidden intentions, and the true face behind the mask.

Surprisingly, on the other hand, honesty and a keen eye is all you need to observe the irony and smile.

The idea for this blog was inspired by a quote I read on Instagram. It brought back an old memory that made me smile. Before sharing it with you, I’d like to give a brief summary about my acquaintance with social media (feel free to skip this part if you’re in a hurry)

It wasn’t until 2015 or 2016 that I opened a Facebook account, and downloaded other social media apps like WhatsApp. It wasn’t that I hadn’t heard about them, of course I had, but I am a full time mother with prioroties and daily plans. I was happy with using Skype, Yahoo, or Hotmail messengers for social commuications. Back then, things were simpler, and more convenient. But, sometimes, you can’t say “no” to change, especially when your children are getting involved. Since then, I’ve found myself in group chats; one for the mummies, one for close friends, one for other friends who are not close, one for community activities, and so on. Oh, these groups were funny, troublesome, and really a waste of time.

One day, a friend on one of the groups asked me a question about Quran recitation, as I was the only member with a qualified certificate. I answered her question, and she asked another. The questions and answers continued for a while. After many messages back and forth, she said: “Don’t think I’m examining your knowledge.”

“Why would I? You asked and I explained,” I replied. Honestly, that was how I felt, but at that monent, I realised it really was like  she was examining me. If only she had known that, out of respect for the age gap between us, I didn’t want to excuse myself and tend to my other chores.

She disappeared without a reply, no thanks, nothing. In fact, she wasn’t friendly with me, and if it hadn’t been for the group, I believe our paths would have never crossed.

Can you see how people can tell on themselves?

They say professional liars have bad memories. That must be why they end up exposing themselves.

With hope and peace,

Nahla

personal thoughts

Jumping Mentally And Physically

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I have just finished the book I was reading, and I really enjoyed it. It took me longer to finish this book than it usually takes with others. But, I made up my mind not to write anything – not to post on my blog – until I had finished it. And finally, I did.

Honestly, switching from reading classics to philosophy felt like jumping from one building to another. Both are skyscrapers, but their constructions are totally different. If you’re curious and want to know more about this book, here’s the link.

https://nh825.wordpress.com/2025/03/12/anam-cara/

By the way, have you ever jumped from a building to another nearby?

One day, many many years ago, I was with my cousins at my grandparents house in the countryside. The houses were so close that mainly an alley separating them. My cousins, one after another, jumped from the window to the roof of the other house. I watched their numbers decrease until no one was left but me. One of my cousins was waiting for me – encouraging, extending her hand, and begging me to hurry up as we had to catch up and continue the game with the others. On the other side, I stood, glued to the big window, looking down at the gap between the two houses, and felt it like a deep dark well. My heart stopped beating, almost.

‘You won’t fall down, trust me,’ said my cousin.
‘No’, I said, shaking my head.

She left and ran to catch up with the others. I burst into tears and ran out of the door just like a frightened cat to follow them, but by using the stairs. There, downstairs, I found them all, not waiting for me, but hurrying inside as the mothers were calling us to have the afternoon meal. People say that when you’re hungry and there is food, you think of nothing but eating. That was exactly what happened. We all ate our meal and then hurried outside to play again.

A few years later, after this incident, Cairo was struck by the worst earthquake in its history. I still remember how our ten – floor building was shacking like a rattle in a kid’s hand. My parents had just left to upper Egypt where my grandparents lived after receiving the news about my grandmother’s death. So, it was just my older sister, my brother, and me. I was doing my homework when the walls started shaking suddenly and violently. My heart pounded hard, and my whole body shook like everything around me. I ran to my older siblings, and we all stood in the hallway, looking to one another in panic. We believed the building was collapsing, as it never crossed our minds that it was an earthquake. Then, we heard the neighbours, people on the road, all screaming and wailing, “It’s an earthquake”. As the three of us ran to get out, everything stopped. The following day, or two days later, I went to see my friend, who was also my neighbour, living in the ground floor. Her leg was in a cast.

‘How?’ I asked.
‘I jumped out of the window.’

I burst out laughing. She lived on the ground floor, and all she had to do was open the door and ran out of the building. Instead, she took the shortcut, which wasn’t that dangerous, but it seemed that, instead of jumping, she threw her full body out of the window.

It’s hard to jump, both physically and mentally, into something different, new, or unexpected. But isn’t that also normal? There are people who jump without giving it a second thought, and, there are people who take their time – to jump, to enjoy reading a book, or even to write a new post.

With hope and peace,

Nahla

personal thoughts

They Don’t Cost Much

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There are things that cost little but can brighten your day, draw a genuine smile on your face, and take you by beautiful surprise.

These things surround us in abundance, waiting just for us to notice and enjoy. Can you think of any? Please do.

Isn’t it interesting how these little things that make your day can be as much given as received? What could be better than kind words spoken fully and sincerely, without abbreviations? They are simple, free, and abundant.

Everyday greetings, wishes, and casual compliments are among the simplest you can offer to make someone’s day. “Thank you”, “Good morning”, “Have a good day” – all are free of charge, yet full of beautiful meaning.

Have you ever thought that there is a higher level of kind words, those that can fill your heart with peace and delight? These are blessings.

I once read that the word  “Hello” doesn’t exist in the Gaelic culture. Instead, blessings were used during their daily encounters. Isn’t this beautiful? This is so similar to my Arabic culture, where blessings are plentiful in our greetings.

May peace be with you.
May God be with you.
May God guide your path.
Be in God’s care and assistance.

There are loads of blessings, and do you know what, goodness in my form – be in words, deeds, or feelings – always returns to the one who gives it.

So, why give less when you can give more? After all, you will receive your great share of happiness. That’s God’s promise for both the giver and the receiver.

With hope and peace,

Nahla






story

I Want Your House!

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‘Good morning Madame.’

‘Good morning Sir, how can I help you?’

‘I’m your wealthy neighbour, the third road on the left. My mansion can’t be missed.’

Of course I know your mansion, heard about you,  no need to brag about your power and wealth. Besides, I have never wished, never would, to be honoured either with your presence or your company, I thought holding the door half -open. 

He remained silent, looking from me to my house. I remained silent looking from him to his massive, monstrous car swallowing the whole wide road just like an enormous  whale stuck in a small lake.

‘You’ve got a beautiful house,’ he said, with one of those fake forced smiles.

‘Thank you,’ I replied.

‘May I come in and have a look?’ Now, his smile was a mockery one.

‘A look at what?’

‘Your house.’

‘Have anyone told you mine is for sale?’

‘If you allow me some of your time, I’ll be happy to explain things.’

‘I’m so sorry but I don’t know you and I can’t let you into my house to explain things that have nothing to do with me.’

All his smiles, forced or mocking, disappeared. His face reddened and his eyes blazing. He was, definitely, on the brink of exploding, but that wouldn’t be my fault, would it?

‘But of course, they have. It’s about your house which I know is not for sale. But, I’ve come to offer you the deal of a lifetime.’

‘For my house which is not for sale?’

‘Yes. Now may I come in to talk business?’  He looked a bit calmer, a bit hopeful.

‘No.’

‘Why?’

‘I told you.’

‘I can turn your house into a fairytale palace.’

‘It’s already my fairytale miniature palace.’

 ‘Your garden will be exotic and magical.’

‘Thank you very much but I’m not a wich.’

‘Your kitchen will turn into a sophisticated, modern restaurant with…

‘Sophistication and I do not go well together.’

‘Your bathroom…

‘Clean and tidy.’

‘How many rooms do you have?

‘Enough.’

‘Your bedroom..

‘I want to replace my dressing, and fix my wardrobe drawers.’

‘Give me time to explain.’

‘What do you want?’

‘Your house. It would make a great extension to my compound, influence, and buisness. But it will also remain your place. You can choose to live in its modern renovated version, or nearby. I’ll simply hold the “ownership”, and you will live a better life.’

‘Thank you very much but my house is not for sale.’ I shut the door.

He exploded, but, unfortunately,  I don’t have a fire extinguisher to contain the mess.

With hope and peace,

Nahla

Just writing

It’s A Beautiful Day!

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Finally the sun graces us with its warm, bright rays. It’s true that weather can affect people’s mood. I believe even animals and plants can also be affected by the changes of weather.

If you ask me ‘how do you feel today’? ‘Happy’, I will say. This is the first thing I felt when I stepped out of the house into this beautiful, warm day. Now, as I am writing this post, I feel blessed too.

What about you? How do you feel today? May I ask you to set aside, for a moment or two, any negative feelings and think of a positive one instead. No need to share it, just feel it.

In case you can’t find any, just look at that clear sky and the happy trees in my picture. They say misery love company, and I believe happiness loves company even more.

With hope and peace,

Nahla

personal thoughts

Is It Okay To Step Out Of The Race?

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Of course it is, or, if you want, you can join it but at your own pace. If the turtle wins the race against the rabbit, then it’s better to be the winning turtle than the losing rabbit. That’s my opinion!

Just imagine two people running a race (perhaps you and me). The starting whistle blows, and the first racer makes an incredible start, running faster than sound. A few meteres back, the second racer is also running but at a cyclist’s pace against a train. The first racer’s aim is the gold medal. The second racer joins just to enjoy the experience, believing in everyone’s unique limits and abilities.

Halfway through the race, the first racer keeps on running and running, believing that a winner never gives up. Pushing even beyond sound speed, a pulled muscle, awful cramps, and a burning chest will never overcome strong determination. That’s the first racer’s mindset. But, this strong determination smashes into the hardest wall. All of a sudden, the first racer bends over, can hardly breathe, is on the verge of fainting, and almost collapses.

The second racer is far, very far away from the first’s spot, but senses the danger and feels the urgency of the situation. They say that in an emergency, people can react in two, no three ways: The first, close their eyes and ears and don’t care. The second, be struck by the shock and become another urgent case. The third, dash to help even if it means running into a big fire.

Considering these options, the second racer thanks God, for there was neither fire nor blood ahead. The, a few moments ago, relaxed racer forgets about limits and abilities, and runs like the wind to reach the struggling competitor. Now, it’s the paniced person who steps out of the race, and takes a shortcut to save a life.  Finally, and breathless, the second racer becomes the saviour who reaches a sacred life’s side, offering reassurance, and calling for help.

As I am writing this post, I recall what happened two years ago on sport’s day at my daughter’s school. The event takes place at the end of the summer term, with the running race always being the final activity. My daughter started the race so good. After a few meters, she slowed down and stopped. I could see she was fine, but she was walking back to one of her friends. After a few moments, they both stepped out of the race, walking slowly while leaning against each other. When they finally arrived, I ran to my daughter to check if everything was alright. She was just fine, but she had heard her friend crying at the back. The other girl felt sick and shaky all of a sudden, and my daughter would not leave her friend just to compete in the running race.

The medal is great, and winning is even greater. Is there anyone who wouldn’t like to win the gold medal after extremely hard work? Of course not. But sometimes it’s okay to step out of the race, to respect your limits, and to listen to your heart. In the end, there are many prizes more precious than the gold medal.

Is it okay to step out of the race?

With all the best wishes,

Nahla

Just writing

Baklawa

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Or baklava? Both are correct – the first is in Arabic, and the second in Turkish.

You can buy it from the shops or restaurants, or make it at home. I love to make it. It’s the simplest recipe ever: puff pastry sheets, ground nuts, butter, and syrup. There are millions of videos on YouTube for this simple dessert.

Baklawa is most famous and enjoyed during the month of fasting; Ramadan – our very special, once – a -year guest.

Are your mouth watering  already? Mine is.

Sometimes, you might think, like me, that you can transform your traditional dessert recipe into a healthier one. Here’s my experiment with baklawa last year, and my baklawa this year.

Last Ramadan, I decided to cut all fine sugar and use honey, dates, or fruits in all desserts, including baklawa. It wasn’t because I was on a diet or had any medical issues, but because I want to eat healthily. So, the only change I made to baklawa was to replace the sugar with honey. But honey is thick and has a different taste, yet I insisted on using it.


“Where is the sugar, mama?”
“Why does it taste weird?”
“Is there any other dessert?”

My family compalined, obviously didn’t like it, and neither did I. It wasn’t making your mouth-water but rather make it shut and dry.

Therefore, for this Ramadan, I’m making it the normal way with homemade sugar syrup. Now, that’s the mouth-watering baklawa with layers of pastry sheets full of ground pistachios, walnuts, and almond. On top of each crispy piece, the shiny syrup spreads smoothly and penterates deeply into each layer. One bite of baklawa with its dripping syrup would make it ready to fast for the whole year!

Have you tried fasting before? I’m just wondering how you feel about it?

With all the best wishes,

Nahla