Which one do you prefer: to be liked or to be admired?
This question is not an easy one to answer, so think carefully and take your time before answering it.
Is there anyone who doesn’t want to be liked or, at least, once, admired? I believe there isn’t.
But here’s the thing — you might be liked by many, but you can’t be admired by many. Do you why? Let me explain my perspective.
When you like someone, you feel comfortable, welcome, and happy in their company. That’s how friendship begins — through liking and connecting. But we also experience this feeling in everyday interactions – whether in person or online. It’s a feeling that is spontaneous, common and simple. It doesn’t need time, effort, or contemplation. I imagine you’re already thinking about the many things and people you like— I have done the same. And they can be anyone: the neighbour, the doctor, the teacher, the postman … the list goes on.
On the other hand, when you admire someone, there’s something in that person that evokes respect and awe — it’s what people mean when they say, “You take your hat off to them.” Admiration doesn’t require connection or communication; It just creates recoginition and leaves a lasting, positive impression. Unlike liking, admiration is complix, rare, and deep. It needs time, effort, and contemplation.
Not everyone or everything you like will earn your admiration, right? But isn’t admiration a form of liking?
Imagine a teacher who assigns a special writing task to her class once a year. She’s been teaching for years, knows each of her students well, and liked them all. But because of this special writing task, she discovers more about each one of them. As she reads and marks their work, she finds a piece or two that are not like the rest; a piece that makes her think deeply, feel differently, and even learn something new. She gives that piece full marks — that’s another way of taking the hat off to the exceptional. And that’s admiration.
Now back to my first question: do you prefer to be liked or admired?
I would say I’d rather be liked and let admiration come along whenever possible — as an unpredictable surprise.
With hope and peace,
Nahla
Pure and Simple 