“You can tell a lady, because nobody knows she’s there.”
How would you interpret this quote?
Negative or postive?
Please don’t fight over it. An arabic adage says: if you offer a person a hundred brains to pick one, they pick their own.
According to the context in which this quote was mentioned, a lady doesn’t show off, doesn’t flirt, and, of course, doesn’t forget she’s a woman. And, this was believed to be a positive and respectful image of a lady.
Over the time, things changed, and the positive became negative, and the negative became positive.
And then, things changed again, introducing new criteria: no positive, no negative— all possible, all the same.
Now, can you just move your eyes, perhaps your glasse, to the first line and re-read the quote—carefully this time.
Did you notice anything beyond positive or negative?
What if ‘lady’ is not used as a title or compliment, but as a presence? Did you notice that the ‘Nobody knows’ might also mean ‘they know,’ but with their third eye? And finally, could ‘She’s there’ be anyone and everywhere—yet unlike anyone and not available everywhere.
There are things that don’t fit, match, or combine. Although anything seems possible these days, this perspective remains well-known and carefully considered.
Yesterday, for example, I decided to make, not apple crumble, but strawberry crumble. It just so happened that I had more strawberries and wanted to use them before they expired. I used the usual familiar ingredients but added something extra—something overflowing from its jar— cocoa powder. I added a generous amount to strawberries and baked the crumble. The result was unique—but not in the yummy way. The sweet crumble turned out bitter and sour. Hopefully, today, it will taste more edible.
Perhaps you like the cocoa–strawberry combination. Actually, I enjoy each ingredient separately, but together I found the mix awful. If only the jar had a bit more space, I wouldn’t have undertaken this experiment. But at least there’s a postive outcome—I’m writing this post.
So, as my crumble experiment proved, some things can’t just be added, mixed, or combined. You can’t, for example, blend truth with lies or belief and atheism. If you do, the outcome will be so vague, so meaningless.
Don’t you see the difference between these qualities—or rather the gap that separates them? But, though they can’t mingle, they can still define each other.
Truth is the quality of being true, while lies are things that are not true. See? They can’t be mixed— just like oil and water. Yet, clever as we are, we create something in between and call it ‘a white lie.’ Ironically, instead of using grey—the blend of two colours—we use white, a solid colour that indicates its separate entity, even though it’s attached to ‘lie.’
Therefore, while we may cross the line between certain qualities, we can never erase it.
A few years ago, we purchased a printer—not as a luxury, but because we really needed one. So, we chose an HP model with multifunctional tasks: printing, scanning, and photocopying (faxing was not included). We still have it, and it’s working fine. We haven’t decided to replace it yet, because it’s just eight years old. However, technology has advanced rapidly in recent years, producing massive, unbelievable changes in the electric devices industry.
In comparison to the modern printers, our poor printer seems to have suddenly aged. Nowadays, we realise that it takes a few minutes, and sometimes even longer, to complete a print order, making us almost give up waiting. Not to mention, how it chugs along during printing, just like an old steam locomotive from the 19th century. Still, I find it really entertaining.
What about multitask printers? I read that they’re the postmodern generation of the multifunctional ones. They can print, scan, copy, and fax at the same time. Perhaps they can talk, maybe even walk. Isn’t that mind-blowing? But, they also say that these new-age printers, though very efficient, have a complex internal mechanism that makes their repair an awful nightmare. So, if it breaks down, you will cry your eyes out over the money you’ve spent because you’ll have no choice but to replace it. That’s why I wish my old printer a long, healthy life.
Now let’s move to the main point of this post. Do you prefer to be multifunctional or a multitasker? But first, let me share my perspective on both.
There’s both flexibility and practicality in being multifunctional as you can do certain jobs in your own time. However, being a multitasker is like being unbendable and machinery. Any multitasker has to handle more different tasks within nearly the same fixed timeframe just like a multitask printer.
If there’s anything that could summarise a multitasker’s life, there would be nothing better than a juggler tossing and catching balls into the air all his life. He smiles, perhaps laughs, and perhaps putting on a clown costume too—such a good player. But what a life to live when you can’t let go, when you can’t miss the ball, when you can’t stop to breathe, really breathe.
A multifunctional person’s life needs no juggling, no balls to toss and catch. You just pick the right job, just as the bowler picks the right ball. You handle one task at a time, taking your time to fulfill it before moving on to the next task. The bowler grips the ball, takes a good position, and throws it—done. He may hit the target, and he may not, but he does the job with careful calculations and adaptability.
Over the years, I have met many people. I saw how some made their life even harder by choosing to be multitaskers. And they complain about challenges and exhaustion. They wish others would lend a hand or that things were easier. But aren’t they the ones who chose to be the juggler? Why did they choose to work like multitask printers, taking on multiple tasks all at once?
“To be or not to be, that is the question.” is really a great slogan, but I prefer to live by this one: To live, and to choose how to live—that is the question.
“Sometimes the urgency of our hunger blinds us to the fact that we are already at the feast.”
Indeed.
How many times have you focused on what’s missing while abundance is present in your life?
Food is just a well – drawn metaphor in this quote, reminding us of how greedy and voracious humans can be.
Imagine you’re at a royal feast with a dreamy banquet as if it’s just fallen straight from heaven. Starving, you keep moving around the grand table, mainly looking for what’s missing, what’s not been served yet, or what’s already gone. In your haste, you leave – having neither tasted the various, mouthwatering dishes nor savoured their warm, wafting aroma.
Sometimes, we want something now – right now, this very moment–and we want it so much that we turn a deaf ear and a blind eye to other solutions, opportunities, exits already there in life, staring back at us. They are waiting to be seen, considered, and embraced. Only later do we realise how and why we missed it all.
On the other hand, can we think of this quote the other way round? I mean to consider that what you’re missing is so precious, so needed, that the abundance you’ve aleady accumulated and possessed as valuable treasures are just worthless extras in your life.
Imagine the same feast, the same banquet, and yourself in the same scene I drew earlier. But in this version, you savoured every dish and every drink until you’re completely full. You talk, you nod, you smile and laugh with other guests. Perhaps, you even make some good buisness deals – earning more money, gaining more possessions, and suffering more headaches. But then it’s time to leave for the feast doesn’t last for ever, does it?
As you’re leaving you glance back at the feast with a strange, nagging feeling. What’s been missing? You wonder. For the first time, just before getting into your car, you catch sight of two birds flying together out of their nest. It’s already dawn, and the fresh, soft light of a new morning begins to lighten the dark sky. How much I miss this simplicity, this inner peace, and a true companion, you whisper and drive away.
Which interpretation of the quote relates more to you? Just think about it.
There are beautiful lines in Arabic that explain why some people choose to disappear from your life, and why you shouldn’t ask about their whereabouts. I’ve just read them a few days ago, and here’s my translation:
If they were honest with you, they would have stayed, If they were missing you, they would have come back, If they were angry at you, they would have complained, And if they truely loved you, they would have wept. But sometimes, things are just like that. Those who have chosen to disappear from your life are the ones who have used you to their full capacity.
Aren’t these lines so true?
But don’t worry, because some people come into your life to give you bittersweet lessons that help you grow into a better person.
They asked her why she said ‘no’ to his marriage proposal. ‘Because he’s so poor—money is all he has,’ she said, smiling.
I read this very short story once, and isn’t it a beautiful brief one that offers priceless advice to young girls and women around the world.
Say that’s vague idealism, that’s madness, or that’s out-of‐place -and- time wisome. Still, it’s such genuine advice — an ultimate truth! Money alone doesn’t make real happiness.
Just read it carefully. It simply means not to marry only for money. Yes, those who seek only money in life may have it multiplied, trilionied, and live the life of their dreams – or even a life that surpasses all possible dreams. Yes, they can buy the whole world, govern it, and control it. Yes, they can look young, enjoy perfect health, and create robots. But all of it can vanish in the blink of an eye, as can the life around it. Money without sanity, without communication, without understanding, without wisdom — and above all, without love can’t create a strong bond or a healthy marriage.
One old Egyptian movies dramatised this idea beautifully. The hero was an illiterate – completely illiterate – but a very smart garbage dealer (I’m not sure if this is the right word for his profession but he owned something like a waste dump centre) He made a fortune at a young age, and his wealth grew year after year. One day, a beautiful young lady crossed his path, and without wasting any time, he began his investigation. He found out that she was in love with a poor but highly educated teacher, and he also knew about her dream of becoming a doctor. He knocked straightaway on her parents’ door, asking for her hand. Dazzled by both his money and his promise to fund her medical qualification, she agreed to marry him.
Halfway through the movie, the poor girl became a famous doctor, Her husband made more and more money but remained the same illiterate garbage dealer. Their married life turned into a distant life, just like that of two distant relatives who hadn’t met, rarely talked to each other, and never shared any warm feelings.
One day, the husband decided to change things by all means when he discovered he was dying. He was the one who made his wife a famous doctor, and believed he had the very right to be a part of her life untill the end. He began visiting her clinic, joining her meetings, and waiting for her every night. Yet,things went from bad to worse. He couldn’t understand anything about medicine or even understand his wife. She hated him, hated his money, and hated her life, until she finally asked for a divorce. But it was too late. The last scene was for the wife, screaming and crying, full of guilt because she hadn’t tried even once to help her husband as he had helped her. And, she hated herself for marrying only for money.
Now, do you still think that’s all just vague idealism?
As usual I was scrolling through Instagram last night when I came across a post that, in my view, was quite strange. The vlogger’s video briefly showed his ‘Loving All’ motto. Do you get it? Let me explain more.
Throughout the video, the vlogger was holding different posters, which he changed one after the other. Each poster has one main sentence, beginning with ‘ I love’ and the rest of the sentence referred to different things — different, but not necessarily opposites. Honestly, I don’t doubt his good intentions or his attempt to spread kindness and love. The problem is that my mind couldn’t understand his ‘loving all’ logic. Let me give you an example that, by the was way, wasn’t in any of his posters, but similar to the idea of his examples.
Suppose one day, you pass by a person holding a sign which read : “I love pork. I love halal food.” I don’t know how would you react. Perhaps, you wouldn’t even notice him or his sign, and keep on walking. I would definitely walk on too, but, to be honest, I wouldn’t forget about the sign.
If the person were a Muslim, I would wonder why on earth he was saying that, considering the whole world knows that Muslims don’t eat pork. If he was not, I would first wonder whether he understands that this combination is impossible? Then I would wonder why he didn’t just use ‘eat’ or ‘can’ instead of ‘love’. Love is such a strong word, full of feelings, whereas ‘like’ is simpler, more casual, right? To love something means to accept all of it, and if you accept all of it, it’s impossible to accept what can’t be a part of it? This is why the two sentences together seem awkward. Does this make any sense? I hope it does.
I love it when I go to London, which doesn’t happen often because of the distance. I like to watch people of different sizes, colours, and cultures crossing the same road together. They probably don’t know each other, don’t have to love each other, but there some sort of understanding and respect filling the air around them.
Can a person love everyone and everything? Is it possible to repeat ‘Amen’ to everything, even without listening ? But then, what would you become? And, where would you stand?
Having a well- furnished mind is usually interpreted within academic qualifications. But is that the only method to furnish and nourish our minds? Take your time to think about it. I did take mine while reflecting on my own experience
You have to go to school to learn, then to universities to earn a degree, and if you can afford it, pursue the higher level of postgraduate studies. At each stage, our minds are expected to grow and develop — and they do, unless incidents like cheating and plagiarism are involeved. That’s why education has become the most powerful weapon both nations and individuals strive to possess. And, this is how I have been raised, following this strategy. Still this strategy is not the only method to effectively furnish your brain.
How did you feel when you finished your academic studies and stepped into the real world? Did you feel as if you had entered a new phase of practical education taught through real life experiments in real life labs? Did you feel this confrontation shaking you to the core because, in most cases, you were not ready to learn more or to abondon what you had already spent years learning. That’s exactly how I felt after my graduation.
I have learned and am still learning more from life — with its people, its places, its changes, and its ups and downs. I’ve learned from reading, imagination, writing, and blogging. All of these things and more have nourished and furnished my mind. You know what? I really feel blessed to be a full — time mother, because it has given me more time to become the person I truely like to be.
The rose is without why She blooms because she blooms She does not care for herself Asks not if she is seen
Isn’t this a beautiful poem?
And, yes, why ask why when the answer shines clear like daylight in summer?
And, why ask why when others might not see you, yet you know you do exist?
And why ask why nobody cares when you believe there’s a God who always cares?
Do we need to give reasons, seek appreciation, or crave validation to exist in this world?
But we do exist, and all we need is to be ourselves. In other words, all we need is authenticity to find our peace of mind, our beauty, and our own journey in life.
Now, do you know why the rose lives without why? Or, perhaps, you have a different interpretation of the poem?
Natural catastrophes happen. At school, we study the basics about earthquakes, volcanoes, floods, tsunamis, storms, and more. Meanwhile, scientists have been studying, investigating, analysing these phenomena over the years. There’s no doubt that they have been doing their best — researching, trying to find solutions to help and save lives whenever disasters happen, but they can’t prevent them.
Scientists can create robots, smart technologies, and floating cities in the sky or on the seas, but they can never recreate this world, this earth, even this tree I am looking at through the window. And they truely know this fact. They understand that when faced with natural phenomena, their ulimate abilities and genius can mainly focus on predictions, solutions, and protections — there’s no way to prevent, challenge, or defeat them. Creation is not man-made, but divinely crafted by the One Creator.
It’s heartbreaking when you hear, see, or read about innocent victims losing their lives, or those of their beloved ones, in any of these catastrophes. But as we say in Arabic, there are many causes of death, but death is the same. In other words, when one’s time comes, they will pass away whether because of a natural catastrophe or peacefully in their cosy bed.
Now, let’s turn to human inhumanity, which causes more damage, more cruelty, more bloodshed than what natural catastrophes ever do. Do you know why? Because human inhumanity destroys all noble and humane concepts that could help create a new beginning. During natural catastrophes, kindness, sympathy, and goodness are revived, spread, and shared by people around the world. However, in human inhumanity, the world takes sides. The news of innocent victims is suppressed, ignored, and marginalised.
Would you pay a little attention to that brief, end ‐of -the news addition about those innocent victims of inhumanity in other parts of the world, and at least remember them in your prayers?
